Animals are People

I've been M.I.A. for the past few days. I found out that my beloved, 13 year old doggie has cancer. We've had to make the choice of whether to put her through chemo or not. We've decided not to go that route. It's so hard to make a decision for someone who can't speak to you, but my gut tells me it is what she wants. I've been through so much with this dog. We've gone on week long camping trips in the mountains. We've even rappelled off of a mountain together. She was strapped to me. :) She's gone to the beach and run through the waves. She's never been boarded. We've always taken her with us on any trip, and when we just couldn't take her, she would stay with her grandparents or close friends.

I was really torn up when I found this out. I took a nap with her yesterday, and I fell asleep with my arm around her. Her breathing was so soft, and it put me to sleep. I woke up, and I felt this peace come over me. I can't really explain it any other way. I love her, and I don't want her to die, but she has accepted that it is her time. I owe it to her to accept that, as well. We're going to do whatever it is she wants. So far, she has had a steak for dinner one night, gets to take as many walks as she wants, and gets to sit outside with me in the hammock as long as she wants. She will go visit her grandparents and aunt tomorrow. They have ducks, and she loves to play with them. Her aunt even has a special room that she likes to stay in. She's always been able to do these things, but they just seem so much sweeter now. I can honestly say that I have no regrets, and I hope she doesn't either.

I think she came into my life when I needed the type of friend who would just listen. I've grown up with her, and she knows things about me that no one else ever will. Her time will come soon. They've given her between two to four weeks. I hope it's peaceful. I love her. Thanks for listening.