Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Bash Alexandra's Ex-Husband Contest

Well, my ex-husband just landed a job in mine and Sukie's division. He won't be on our floor or anything, but there will be times when we have to work with him. What the fuck? What in the fuck was someone thinking? Sukie thinks that most people don't even know he's my ex-husband because I was always too ashamed to tell anyone. Here's where you come in. Sukie has declared a verbal assault on him. Please comment and tell us some of the hateful things she should say and/or possibly do to him. The winner will win the satisfaction of knowing that you brightened my day with your hateful words. I guess I should look at the bright side. I'll have a hell of a lot more blogging material now.

8 comments:

Unknown said...

I wish I could but I dont know anything at all about the guy as to why he sucks.

General hatred: Shut the fuck up you stupid cunt, you had better not come near me you stupid cunt, go fuck yourself, etc...my creative juices just arent flowing here.

Alexandra Bitchford said...

He was addicted to porn and ran up credit card bills. His dumb ass also cheated on me. This is wrong on all levels, but especially wrong because I'm hot, and he's a dork with a receding hairline. This goes back to my embarrassment issue.

just north of Eastwick said...

Oh my.....there's so many ways you could make fun of him. There's the body hair issue--the man looks like a walking rug. There's the serial killer-looking glasses he wears (well, I haven't seen him in ages, but I guess he still wears that style). And you could always bring up the whole addicted to porn thing in public--I'm sure that would embarrass him.

Anonymous said...

The best revenge is living well.

Sukie Bitchmont said...

He still looks like a serial killer. I have all sorts of plans for the whole addicted to porn thing. He doesn't stand a chance--not one.

Anonymous said...

Anything with the hair or porn would be good. Combining them would be exponentially better.

Next time he is around, you should just start telling the people around that you read in Cosmo that men who watch too much porn loss their hair prematurely. Something about protein loss or something...

Anonymous said...

Or you could just start the rumor that a friend of yours got drunk a couple years ago and slept with him once, and that he had a small pecker, prematurely ejaculated, and then cried afterward. That is just point blank.

You could also have all of the women and men in the department to introduce themselves using porn names. Hey. This is Jenna Jameson in Finance and Peter North in accounts payable. That may be too hard to pull off.

I could go on all day with this stuff.

Mrs. Flax said...

T, you sound experienced in these matters . . . .:)