Look Out for your Neighbor

When the economy began tanking, I knew it would be bad, but I didn't anticipate how desperate people would become. This is a news story detailing a bank robbery that happened in a county down the road from Eastwick. According to the police, the man did not have a criminal record. I'm not excusing robbing a bank and putting these people in danger, but I think we will see more and more of this. I was having a conversation with Mr. Preppypants the other day, and he just pissed me the fuck off. As you can imagine from my previous posts, Mr. Preppypants and I do not agree on a lot, especially on politics. He was giving his view on the stimulus package and President Obama. He basically said that the whole thing blows, and he shouldn't be held responsible for helping someone else. Well, why not? I've always felt like the Republican party, which Mr. Preppypants belongs to, feels as though community organizations should take care of people down on their luck. In the Eastwick area, this mainly consists of faith-based organizations. Now, I don't prescribe to the Eastwickeans idea of religion, but I still believe that these places do wonderful things for my community. I try to give as much as I'm able to give. I asked Mr. Preppypants, "When is the last time you gave money to one of these organizations? When was the last time you volunteered?" His response was that he shouldn't have to help "these" people. My response was, "Well, if we don't help through the community and faith based organizations, then the government will have to get involved." His response was for them to fend for themselves. I would like to think that I'm right, but who knows. All I know is that it makes me feel better to care for my neighbor than to turn a blind eye. I wish someone would have done that for the man in the article. Maybe he wouldn't have felt so trapped.

Technology Killed the Library Book

I've heard about the Kindle. Have you guys? Apparently, there is a new version out. Here's a story. Why would someone want to read a book on a tiny computer screen? Some of my most relaxing moments have happened sitting in a lounge chair with stacks and stacks of library books around me, while a nice ocean breeze ruffled the pages. Never in this moment have I had to worry about sand in my Kindle. What the fuck, people? I love technology. I'm not a person that thinks technology is only for young people. I also don't think it will destroy us all. It can be really cool and convenient; however, it can also take things away from us. You never know what you will find in a library book. I love it when someone has actually written little notes throughout the book. I borrowed a book from Sukie awhile back, and she had underlined some of her favorite passages. It made me pay attention to those passages and ask her about them later. It sparked a nice conversation on the way to work. This would NOT have happened with the Kindle. I'm hoping that this new technology will die along with the PedEgg and the Kinoki detox foot pads. Eww.

Coraline

Mr. Bitchford and I do not go to the movies much, but we finally decided to check out Coraline last night. Now, you must first know that I do NOT go to the movies at night and/or on the weekends. I do not like most people, so I don't want to be surrounded by a bunch of Eastwickeans. We arrived, and I was amazed at the amount of people there. Once we entered the theater (with both of us already wearing our 3D glasses because we are geeks like that), I was overtaken by the smell of wonderful, greasy food. There was popcorn with trans fat topping on it. There was candy being rattled around in packages. There were sodas as big as my fucking head being slurped, and there was motherfucking pizza! I did not know that the movie theater sold pizza. So, we sit down with our Buddy Holly look alike 3D glasses on, and the previews begin. Just so you know, an awesome looking Tim Burton film will be coming out in September. I believe it is called 9.


So, Coraline bounces on to the screen, and she has blue hair. She's terribly cute and quirky looking, and the intro is very Beetlejuice like. I won't go into too much detail because I encourage you to go check it out. Here are some things to look forward to in the film.

• Scary Scotty dog bats
• Naked cartoon boobs
• Teri Hatcher turning into her real-life self near the end
• Some balls almost being cut off

All in all, you should expect a very dark, but wonderful movie. Oh, and a plus is that They Might Be Giants sing a song in the movie. Very cool.

Did you know...

...that Americans looking to adopt are more likely to adopt a foreign-born child than a Black child born in America?

Meanwhile, American-born black children up for adoption are more likely to be adopted by non-American parents, particularly Canadians, Germans, French, English, and Belgium parents (also parents from the Netherlands...what are they called? anyway...).

Says a lot about where we rank skin color in terms of importance in this country, eh?

BTW: Black babies are cheaper to adopt, too--it's like they're on sale...just trying to get Americans to take them. Instead, Americans pay a lot more money for a Russian orphan--because its white--or an Ethiopian--because, thanks to Angelina Jolie et. al., that's vogue.

Source: Christian Science Monitor (2004--yeah, it's been 4 years or more, but I bet it hasn't changed much statistically). And no, I wasn't just catching up on the CSM. ;-) A book I was reading cited this source, so I looked it up.

Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes

Hershey closing Peppermint Patties plant in Pa.

This was the headline that caught my eye today. The peppermint patties will no longer be made in the U.S. Production will now be in Monterey, Mexico. The news report stated that around 300 U.S. jobs will be lost. When I first heard the news, my instinct was to not buy this product anymore. If everyone has the same reaction, then the peppermint patty will cease to exist. Is this right or wrong? I guess it's just me exercising my right as a consumer, but it seemed sad. I've heard the news, like everyone else, about losing American jobs, but for some reason the Hershey giant having to give up and move production of one of its popular candies made me really sad. Will you guys continue to buy products that are made in other countries? I try to buy local, but it can be expensive and hard to find certain products. Any tips out there?

Alexandra the Rapper

Do you ever have something happen at work, and you think you blogged about? You go back through all of your blog entries, and you can't find it. WTF, right? I thought I had told you guys about this woman I had been working on a project with. This was last year, but I'll give you a summary to lead into the new happenings. Long story short, we were chosen to work on the same project, but we were from different departments. She felt that she was in charge, and I thought we were working as a team. She tried to give me what she called a directive, and I laughed at her. She then went on to bob her head at me, wag her finger, and call me a little white girl. She's black. I was really upset, and I've thought about it a lot since. It really bothered me that she saw me as just some white girl she worked with. I guess at least I was little.

Anyway, she has a new boss. The boss came to me and asked if I could sit in on some meetings with this woman and evaluate her. The new boss felt like I had more experience in this particular area, and the new boss felt that I might could help. Turns out that the bitch really sucks at her job. It was worse than I thought. I was not mean, but I was very honest with her new boss. The new boss decided to demote her and put me in charge of mentoring her on her motherfucking job! It's funny because karma is a bitch, but as you can imagine, I'm not looking forward to this. She won't be happy. I thought I could show up on the first day and rap for her. Here's what I have so far.

Yo, yo, yo bitches
I'm a little white girl
Short and small
You fucked with me
So I took your job and all, beeyotch.

Feel free to add your own lines.

I'm as Free as a Bird Now

My birthday is coming up next month, so Mr. Bitchford asked me to make a wish list. Here it is.

1. A tiara
2. A porch swing
3. A rocking chair
4. A pearl handle revolver that will fit in my favorite handbag

He looked at the list and said, "Wow. You really are southern." I don't really identify with being a southern woman because southern people are usually depicted as stupid. We don't all have a thick drawl, and we aren't all conservative Baptists. I'm a somewhat Buddhist following socialist stuck in Eastwick. Now you see why I need the pearl handled revolver. I feel very out of place because of the way I speak and because of my political and social views. On the flip side of this, I fit right in at a honkey tonk with a bottle of beer in my hand. There's nothing like spending the day out on the lake, and then spending your evening on the deck of your favorite watering hole. So, while I may call a vending machine a ge-dunk (because of the sound the food makes when it falls), and I might say ya'll, this doesn't mean that I fit all of the southern stereotypes. Just don't show anyone my birthday wish list, please. ;)

On the 200th anniversary of Darwin's birth

I find it frightening that 25% of Americans still don't believe in evolution. And most of those? Don't believe in it because they believe in the Bible. You should have heard these people talking on CNN today! It was ridiculous! Example: "Darwin was a hack. The Bible says God created man from dust. And the Bible is truth. Therefore, it is truth that God created man as man and evolution cannot be truth." A little circular reasoning, anyone? Ever heard of begging the question? It's too much, I assume, to expect they've ever taken a biology class. Or a logic class. Especially considering the poll also reveals a direct correlation between education level and belief. Those with more education believe in evolution; those with little education staunchly refuse to believe it. Figures.

Yo...Joaquin Raps!

Joaquin Phoenix is going to be a rapper.

Courtesy of YouTube:

You gotta give him one thing: he's got some seriously high self-esteem, yo!

Eastwick (technically our state, but whatever) Senator Pitches a Fit

Here he is, folks! Lindsey Graham! Late last year, Mr. Graham voted for the bailout package. In fact, he was quoted as saying the bailout is a bad choice, but not passing it would be catastrophic to our economy (http://www.wspa.com/). As everyone knows, we bailed out those companies, and now they are taking lavish vacations and buying rugs that cost as much as my house. Fast forward to the present. Mr. Graham has come out *(no pun intended) against the stimulus package. Just today he was on the floor waving the bill around, so everyone could see how thick and full of pork it is. Now, I'm not saying that there aren't some things that could be trimmed from the package, but come on! He kowtowed to the bailout package, but when there is a Democratic president, he wants to wave giant stacks of paper in the air and act like he has a giant set of balls. Barbara Boxer (D-CA) called his punk ass out today, and he tried to bow up and blabber something about bipartisanship. He doesn't give a shit about bipartisanship. He sure as hell didn't last year, so what gives now? He was too busy following John McCain around and being his fucking lap dog. See...

Oh, and he wants to talk about bipartisanship and working together. Then what the fuck is up with this...

Thanks for making our state on its way to bankruptcy. I'm glad you are concerned about the really important things. I mean it's not like Eastwick is being affected by the economy or anything. It's not like the entire fucking state isn't on one big furlough. There are no lines at the unemployment center. The teachers are being paid so much that they just line the fucking class gerbil cage with money. Listen to the people, Mr. Graham. We voted for change!

*It's a joke in our state that Senator Graham is gay. He has never said that he is, and I could really give two shits one way or the other.

The Results are In...

drumroll, please............ 9lbs! Woo hoo!

The First Weigh In

I weigh in tomorrow morning, and I feel like I've lost some weight this week. I've been following my online plan, and it hasn't been that bad. Just North of Eastwick is doing this with me, so we've used each other for support. I've earned activity points this week, and I haven't used them! This is a good thing. If I lose 2 lbs., then I will earn some itunes bucks. I need some new tunes for my iPod. If I'm going to be working out more, then I need some variety. Any suggestions? I'm thinking of downloading some Katy Perry. No, I'm not a 13 year old preteen, but I do enjoy the fast beats in some of her songs. I think I could run to them. Wish me luck!

Friends and Babies

My oldest friend from my hometown is having a little girl, and I'm surprisingly excited. We've been friends since we were 7 years old, and we've managed to maintain a close friendship all these years. I've always enjoyed doing nice things for my friends, but I've noticed that I'm enjoying buying for this baby more than I have others. For example, I commissioned Jessie at David's Doll to make a baby blanket. It's very pretty, and it features my friends really loud color choices. Then, I got a phone call from my sister yesterday. She was traveling for work, and she had stopped in a store that carried baby Uggs. Now, I know these shoes are hideous, but they are very warm and comfy. My friend loves Uggs, and I knew she must have a pair for the new baby. Are they not the cutest things you've ever seen?

I love putting presents together, and I'm wondering if there is anything I'm missing. So, for you moms out there, what else should I include in the present?