Monday, April 6, 2009

Hell has Frozen Over

Ok, ya'll. It is officially April, and we are expecting snow tonight. I don't think it will accumulate, but damn! Al Gore, I would like to know what the fuck is up with this weather. Are the poor polar bears migrating to Eastwick?

On an unrelated note, my mother called the other day. She had just come back from a wedding and had wonderful details to share. I think she works with the bride and groom. Anyway, there were four-wheelers, rebel flags, and the bride danced to "I'm a Redneck Woman" by Gretchen Wilson. Oh, and the groom was missing a front tooth. Nope. I'm not making this up.

Now, my mom would like everyone to believe that she was nervously fingering her pearls, but I know better. I bet she was popping wheelies on that four-wheeler with her Ann Taylor suit riding up around her waist. When in Eastwick...;-)

One last thing...if a man comes to your house and tries to sell you some frozen steak, just say no. Check this article out. Seriously, who in the hell buys frozen meat out of the back of a pick-up truck...FROM A STRANGER??? Crazy!

6 comments:

Mrs. Flax said...

You know it. Put nothing past the nasty grannies. I love 'em. The other one groped Captain America at a theme park last week. It was awesome.

Unknown said...

If a man comes to your house trying to sell you ANYTHING you should mace him. Mace him good.

Anonymous said...

Well down here in Ga. they do sell frozen meat out of pickup beds. I always say no but my neighbor did buy some. Swore it was good too!

I might have seen your mama at that wedding. Was she wearing a thong with those pearls?

Liz P.from Ga.

Alexandra Bitchford said...

She probably was, Liz. Even if it was La Perla, it still counts. ;)

just north of Eastwick said...

Those meat selling guys used to come to my neighborhood all the time. Blech. One time they caught me just as I was getting home from work--they were trying to high-pressure me into buying meat. No thank you.

chocolat lover said...

Weve never had men selling meat from vans here, but upto a few years ago there was a guy selling seafood door to door!

I avoided that too.