Win an Advanced Copy of Bombshell Contest

Ok, ladies and gents. You could win your very own copy of Jessie Terwilliger's soon to be released Bombshell. I can guarantee at least one steamy sex scene complete with penetration. This blog entry is actually my contest entry. If you would like to enter, please follow this link.


What is the worst thing you have ever done for money (worked at Burger King? Dug through elephant poo? Sold your body? Think hard.)
I was the Easter Bunny at the mall. It fucking sucked. A child stuck his sucker in my mesh eyeballs and another one peed on me.

Is exotic dancing/stripping akin to prostitution? Why? Site your sources if any.
The only experience or sources I have with exotic dancing/stripping or prostitution is from watching Cathouse on HBO. Air Force Amy and Isabella Soprano were my favorites. As far as prostitution goes, I only see the ladies of the night who work outside of the Big Lots I frequent. I feel bad for them, and I think they deserve a union. I digress. No. exotic dancing/stripping is not prostitution.

If the person you loved absolutely hated you, would you shorten their life by 10 years if it meant that they would love you back?
Ummm, no, but wouldn't that go against what love is about? Hmmm...

If your city decided to put in a strip club, or for those whose cities already have them decided to close the strip club(s,) write your argument to your city for or against the placement/removal of this club. If you cannot include your town name, just call it "Small Town" or "Big City" accordingly.
Dear Small Town,
Most of the citizens of said small town are angry, militant trolls. Not having a way to enjoy a sexual release makes people mean and ugly. Literally. Have you seen the people in this town? So, I say we allow the strip club and create what people in these here parts call the "sin" tax. This tax could go towards our education system, which is in dire need of funding. We will be left with relaxed and educated folks.
Thank you,
Alexandra Bitchford

When you read an article about a female stripper being raped, beaten, murdered, etc. do you feel that she was asking for it with the type of job that she had? Should she have assumed the risk? Did she get herself into this mess by doing the work that she did?
First of all, it's horrific when a sexual crime is committed against anyone. Fuck no she doesn't deserve that. No one asks or deserves to be raped. I've long believed that stripping/exotic dancing and prostitution need to be regulated, and in the case of prostitution, legalized. It's a great way for cities to enjoy an increase in tax revenue. Also, if these ladies had Unions and rights, I do think this industry could benefit everyone...even if you didn't frequent said strippers and/or prostitutes. But, what do I know? I'm also a socialist. ;)

BONUS ROUND!If you were a stripper, what would be your stage name and what song would you dance to? White Shuga would be my name and Cold Hard Bitch by Jet would be my song.

WTF?

You'll never believe this. I just received a company letter with the phrase “low-hanging fruit” in it. It made me giggle. I mean, seriously, that sounds like a pair of old man balls. I believe they were referring to projects we could get to the fastest, but come on. Low-hanging fruit?

What do you think?

Below are my purchases I made on my way home from work. The clerk just smirked at me. *sigh*

Are we Really this Uneducated and Scared?

"Budget includes layoffs, furloughs and closing 3 USC campuses"

This was the headline in The State today. Gov. Sanford (SC) is known for his "cut spending" attitude. He once presented the legislators with an honest to goodness pig to represent their pork spending. Get it? Pig? Pork spending? At the time, I didn't understand why he couldn't present them with some possible solutions rather than a farm animal, but this is S.C.

Below you will find travel spending information on all of our fine representatives in S.C. Please take notice of these numbers. Our education system has been circling the proverbial drain for years now. It looks as though now we are not only plunging into the darkness of said drain, but these guys (because they are all old white guys or will be old white guys one day soon) are backing up the already fucked-up drain.

Travel spending rankings:
Area S.C. House of Representatives
1. Bill Sandifer, R-Oconee County, $15,825
2. Phillip Owens, R-Pickens, $15,213
3. Daniel Cooper, R-Anderson, $13,855
6. Bill Whitmire, R-Oconee, $12,970
8. Brian White, R-Anderson, $12,715
16. Don Bowen, R-Anderson, $12,176
25. Michael W. Gambrell, R-Anderson, $11,826
Area S.C. Senate members
1. Thomas Alexander, R-Oconee, $20,073
7. Larry Martin, R-Pickens, $14,460
16. Kevin Bryant, R-Anderson, $12,732
18. Billy O’Dell, R-Abbeville, $12,394
*Source: South Carolina Office of Comptroller General

So, the Gov says we have no money, and he is going to cut, cut, cut. The legislators agree with him, but they are going to spend, spend, spend. Looks like that pig trick worked wonders. It would be one thing if S.C. was actually a progressive state, but it's not. The money spent above has done very little to benefit S.C., hence the nasty mess we are in. I'm convinced that this is S.C.'s way of keeping its residents stupid and scared. By keeping the residents uneducated (hence the drastic budget cuts happening to education), the men above can continue to get the residents' votes. It's scary, and I don't really see an end or a good solution in sight. On top of everything else, do you want to know what S.C. residents are upset about? The budget? Education? Property taxes? Nope.

"SC officials join church rally for 'I Believe' tags"

Yep. They are upset about the I Believe license tags. A fucking license tag concerning religion. There have been no rallies about the public education system. There have been no rallies concerning the 7% and climbing unemployment rate. Again, the majority has become uneducated and scared.

If we keep cutting education, how are we going to create a workforce? What company would want to build here and hire citizens that came from a second-rate education system due to a lack of funding? Great job with the economic development, Mr. Sanford. My dad and I were discussing this yesterday. He is a "directly to the point" type of man, and I asked him what he thought the answer was. He said, "We should tax the hell out of rich people. It's not good for the soul to have more than you need." This made me smile. It's a typical response from my dad, and it's not too far off. Are there any of you out there with states that are still in the dark ages?

Mr. Vomit Strikes Again

Mr. Vomit has been at it again. I'm not really sure how one person can fuck so many different things up, but he does. Sukie and I have taken over most of the tasks on the project we are working on. 75% of his time has been reallocated to this project, but he always fucks everything up that he does. This is why we just decided to do most of it ourselves. So, he has one task to complete. Just one! You guessed it. He fucks it up. Not only does he fuck the task itself up, but he fucks Sukie over in the process. Plus, he fucks our clients over in the process. Why does management not see who he is? Is he sucking someone's dick? Has he someone sucking someone else's dick? This makes no sense. In these economic times, these are the people who should be weeded out. The only thing that is keeping me from walking up to him tomorrow and punching him directly in his "I"m dumb as shit, but I don't think anyone has caught on" face is the fact that I'm scared of the consequences. I'm just being honest. What in the fuck gives?

The only good thing is that I did swing my mental dick at him. Sukie and I have to take a business trip soon, and it concerns this project. He was wanting to send this other stupid fucking bitch of his, and I just kicked her ass off the trip. I changed the name on all of the registrations for hotel and travel, and I just picked someone who is actually a hard worker and pleasant. Do you know he didn't say a word? So, fuck you, Mr. Vomit.

"I always feel like...

somebody's watching me...ain't got no privacy... "

That's evidently how my dog feels because ever since my last post about her...ahem...sexual proclivities, I have been trying to capture this phenomenon on video. However, though, she may be a masturbater, she is not an exhibitionist, and every time I hit "record," bitch stops what she's doing and gives me this, "What? I'm just a cute dog!" look.

This is the best I got, and really, it does not provide the full effect of witnessing the actual experience because, once again, she knew she'd been caught:

A New Year and a Wish for Rayne

So, the first new year's baby in the state was born in Eastwick. Cool, huh? Not so fast. We have been experiencing a major drought, and the new mother wanted to pay tribute to this. The baby's name was Anniyah Rayne. At first, I thought maybe she just didn't realize how this sounds. I went on to read what she had named her 11 month old child. Her name is Arrayah Sunshine. I'm not kidding. I fucking hate this place.